Tuesday, February 3, 2009

up again...

It seems like every night Patrick is on call (when he has to actually stay overnight at the hospital), I avoid going to sleep. I don't think I feel like I miss him, but obviously, psychologically/physically/emotionally, I do. I put off going to bed without him. I read books. I watch tv. I blog or go on facebook. Because when I lay in bed without him I can hear everything. The wind, the refrigerator, the heater, the ice melting off the shingles...everything. I fear someone will break into the house. Or that the house will catch fire - all bad things that will happen on my watch, without Patrick here to save us. I know it is crazy - but it is true. I've resorted to taking cold medicine (ok -I actually do have an awful cold) just to try to sleep better - but it doesn't work...I just get groggy in the morning.

When he is on block nights or an away rotation, I get used to it. The first night or two are rough, but then I suck it up and get through it. But this rotation he is on call like this every other night or every third night. So I can't get used to it. I sucks. I am sooooo tired! I know he is working hard (although he has been so lucky to actually get a lot of sleep compared to what some people get on trauma) - but I will be happy to have him home again. I am in no way a co-dependant person (anymore :-) but I need him to be home to get a good night sleep!!!!

The kids and I decided earlier that we wanted to go out to eat - so I took them to Red Robin's. I actually had a blast! They were so well behaved and funny and polite. The waitress loved Gavin and when he acts good, so does Evie. So it was a nice evening - even without Daddy.

On another note, the moms in our group have started a a storytime each week. We have our normal wednesday play groups, but now we also have tuesday storytime! Erin Ross started it and has had it at her house most of the time, but today we went to Julie's for a change. I think it may be at my place next week. The kids get together and play (as usual) but we also read a book or two (or more) and try to get the kids in a learning environment. There are babies to Preschoolers and almost all of them love to sit down and listen to Miss Erin read! She does a great job of interacting with them!

This picture is only of some of the kids (thanks for the pic Laura). Evie was playing in the back and some of the littler (sp?) ones weren't listening - but this picture will show you what an awesome support system I have here in Ohio. And this is just a sampling of the exposure and friends my kids have!!! Mondays are family day - but Tuesdays are storytime, wednesday is play group, thursday is spanish lessons and fridays are just fun!

Here are 12 of the kids in the group...we are so blessed!

6 comments:

Jessica said...

I have trouble sleeping when Dan is away, too. Red Robin is our favorite place and the only place I will take Hannah alone. Glad you had a good time with the kids.

I am Laura said...

I have a hard time sleeping too and Ben thought we should get me some sleeping pills -- I said, "Umm then who hears the kids when they need something in the night?" He didn't think of that. I find that television keeps me up longer than if I read a book, but reading a book makes it so you hear all the house noises more so it is a hard battle. Hope the trauma rotation goes by quickly for you.

Mary said...

You are a really busy woman!

Family Ties said...

remind me next week to come to your house...i think madeline may like it - we'll see :)

Julie said...

I have the exact same problem sleeping when Josh is on call. It sucks! The other night I drank a little bit of wine before I went to bed and actually was able to sleep slightly better than usual. It relaxed me just enough to take that nervous "listen for every noise in the house" edge off. Hope you get more sleep soon. =)

the4bulls said...

We still have 8 more weeks of trauma. But Cara will be with me next week, and I go home for 10 days to PA - so it will be done before I know it!